From:http://kludgespot.blogspot.com/2007/08/20-things-i-learned-from-tech-support.html
As long as the world turns, users will still have problemsSubstance abusers and computer operators are the only folks called users. This isn’t by chanceWhen in doubt. RebootSooner or later you will meet a person who types out the words “backslash” or forgets to plug in the power cord. If you haven’t yet, just wait, you willFear the phone. No one just calls tech support to wish you good morningNo user will tell you the whole truth at the beginning of a call“I didn’t do anything” or “It just happened” Are the users mantraAs a support tech, it is your job to break down resistance and get the truthThis is so you can rub the lie in their face, fixing the issue is just a perkSome people will never learnThis means you will always have a jobMaintain a calm voice, even if you’re screaming on the insideThe hold button is your friendWhatever you do, don’t panicThe answer to all users questions should be “Trust me, I know what I’m doing” even if this is a bald-faced lieUsers can smell fear. Once you’ve lost control, all is lostA user who is not listening to you anymore, but rather is trying “their own thing” is not worth your time. Simulate a telephone disconnect and hang up. Trust me, you’re better off.Sometimes fixing a computer is easier than figuring out why it was brokenUsers always want a reason things are fixed. If you’re not sure just lie. They won’t know anyway. “A stray electron passed through the processor and caused…”If possible ask to speak to the youngest person present
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